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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25305466">Parabola</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cosmicboredom/pseuds/Cosmicboredom'>Cosmicboredom</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Age Regression/De-Aging, Auror Harry Potter, BAMF Harry Potter, Canonical Character Death, De-Aged Severus Snape, Established Relationship, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Memory Alteration, Memory Magic, Past Character Death, Post-War, Potions Accident, Pre-Slash, Severus Snape Lives, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Young Severus Snape</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 05:54:37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,887</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25305466</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cosmicboredom/pseuds/Cosmicboredom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>So familiar and overwhelmingly warm<br/>This one, this form I hold now.<br/>Embracing you, this reality here,<br/>This one, this form I hold now, so<br/>Wide-eyed and hopeful.<br/>Wide-eyed and hopefully wild.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Harry Potter/Severus Snape</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>86</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So yes, I was listening to Parabol and Parabola by Tool when thinking about this.<br/>Also, why can't we all get along? Why do I gotta wake up to news stories about ten-year-olds killing each other? Has it really come to this? Are we in a serious state of emergency as a collective species?? Is THIS why the aliens won't come to visit us? I think so... Cuz I should not be watching ppl go completely fraking nuts over masks and whether or not it complies with what you think freedom entails. No one should have to start their days with negativity. Get a grip, human species, this is biological war. We are currently under stress to figure out the COVID virus, now we have to deal with all of you naysayers, non-believers, crack-heads, and anti-vaxxers saying we shouldn't be regulating the public. Well, guess what? Now the US is a leading epicenter for COVID. *slow clap* great freaking job, guys.<br/>I'd gladly take a microchip if it would vaccinate me from all the stupid in this world. SMH<br/>Thank you for coming to my TED talk. I'll be here all week.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Harry woke up to a fierce knocking on his door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Though he couldn’t tell if it had been in his </span>
  <em>
    <span>dream,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he still sat up and pulled on a pair of slacks. Yawning and scratching his stubble, he wandered out of his bedroom at Grimmauld, which used to be Sirius', and then down the stairs slowly. A second, more urgent knock brought him out of thoughts of good coffee and toast. It wasn't a dream.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He made a beeline for the door, careful to avoid the troll foot that Tonks always used to trip on. "Who's there?" He asked through the wood.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I need your help, Potter, let me in."</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>"Draco?"</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yes, and you're a tosser for not already having the door open. Merlin's beard, you are annoying."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry swung the door open to admit his cousin, who was followed by a child with stark black hair. "Who's your friend?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Shut the fuck up, close the door, and get in the fucking kitchen." Draco threatened, pointing his finger into Harry's bare chest. The nail dug into his skin and he rubbed the wound with exaggerated hurt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he did close the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Severus, </span>
  <em>
    <span>please</span>
  </em>
  <span> don't be a child about this." He heard Draco hiss to the child just before he turned to lead them into the kitchen. Harry waved his hand towards the stove and several pots and pans landed themselves onto the fire just as it sprang to life. He seated himself between the fireplace and his guests, and Draco followed his lead while the young wizard alternated between staring at him and the stove.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Tea is on, breakfast will be ready. Why don't you tell me about this unexpected visit?" Harry announced.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Draco glared at him for pushing the issue. "I wouldn't be here unless-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Unless you're dropping off Teddy, I know. Which is why, cousin of mine, I'm asking. This is not Teddy." Harry interrupted pointedly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Draco knew full-well that he didn't like beating around the bush, and so the blonde conceded with a smirk. "You're right, Teddy has never seen Severus before, he couldn't morph to give me a heart attack even if he wished to."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm right here." The younger wizard murmured, sounding petulant but still very quiet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yes, you are, and that is a miracle in and of itself." Harry addressed the child. Of course, over the last few years, he'd seen magic do some very interesting things. But nothing like bringing a dead person to life and then de-aging them. "My point, Draco, is that this is very serious. Why did you bring him here?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"To drop him on you. Why else?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry shook his head. "I can't take him, I work long hours."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Draco leveled him with an icy look. "You could stand to take a vacation."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"This isn't a vacation, it's work."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So then take him with you to work! Potter, you </span>
  <em>
    <span>do</span>
  </em>
  <span> realize that I know every one of your co-workers, and I could have easily passed this to you through them. He is safest with you, and I cannot manage Teddy, Scorpius, </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>Severus. Children were more mother's thing than mine." Draco stood up and brushed his jacket off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Why can't </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> take off work and let Astoria handle this while you are gone?" Harry wondered, smirking since he </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> that Astoria would flip a fucking lid. Draco's narrowing eyes told him exactly what was thought of that idea. "Fine, fine. I'll take him, but don't you go forgetting him! We're not gonna have another incident like the one over Teddy."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Thank you, mostly for the reminder of my past self." Draco spat, but there was no real venom. This was just how they ended up being friends at all; Malfoy would make a glasses joke, and Harry would follow up with Death Eater Dad jokes. "I'll be back on Saturday,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"If you leave him, you can't have him back," Harry said seriously. "He needs stability, not like when I said this about Teddy. Snape's whole life made enemies and I don't wanna start caring only for you to take him away."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No, this one is all yours, Potter. I'll only be back on Saturday because it's Molly's birthday, and Teddy convinced Scorpius to go." Draco let a smile, a real smile, grace his face. And Harry thought, if they weren't cousins, he'd try to land that smile in his bedroom. "Try not to kill yourself," Draco said amicably before walking out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry waited until he heard the front door close before he looked at Severus. The poor boy hadn't said a word since he made his presence known, and was looking anywhere but at him. "So, do you remember anything?" Harry asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I know who people are, vaguely," Snape said through a small, insecure voice. "You are Harry Potter. And I remember that I don't like you very much."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry nodded. This much could be known by how Snape treated him during his days in Hogwarts. "Do you know why, or why Draco would bring you here?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus shook his head, and it made his hair look more unkempt than it was before. "No, but I know that I trust Draco with my life."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So if he brought you here, then you know that you can trust me, even if you don't know why." Harry bit his lip, worried. "Do you remember how you got to Draco's place?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I had to walk, and then some giant took me to a castle where Minerva called for him." Severus recounted. "Can-can I use the restroom? I'm feeling a little sick."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry furrowed his brows but nodded. "Yeah, lemme take you."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm not a baby," the small version of Harry's Potions Professor snapped. And he swore that in the child's body was his sneering, spitting snake of a teacher. He held up his hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I wasn't insinuating that, Snape."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The child appraised him with very adult eyes. "I remember where it is, don't follow me."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Okay," Harry said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He put his hands down after Severus had left the room and let out the breath he didn't know he was holding. There was no way someone could fake that fire in Snape's eyes, and Harry had been the target of it many times in many different ways. It was that internal hate for anything James-related, that hate that Lily had made this offspring with James. It made him wither inside a little, that it was still so very present. He had thought-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, no one else knew about that. This was inherently Snape, even if he didn't remember </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The tea kettle broke his thoughts, scattered them like glass, and he got up to make tea by hand. In the meantime, the pots and spoons were serving up dinner on their own and he sat two mugs beside two plates, hoping Severus would come back. But an hour passed, and while the food was under stasis, Harry was growing worried. What if Severus decided to run instead? How would he get him back? Why did he wait, when every minute passing meant it was a minute more that Severus had been gone?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He got up just as the door opened and Severus walked in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I thought you tried to make a break for it," Harry said, laughing at himself for being so paranoid.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I did, but then I thought better of it," Severus muttered and his hair dripped onto the floor. It must have been raining again. Harry looked at the boy for a long heartbeat before he snapped back to reality.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You are soaked. How long were you out there? Wait here, I'll get you some dry clothes." He said while shaking his head. Of </span>
  <em>
    <span>course,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Severus tried to leave, and of course, his luck would run out in Harry's favor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You don't have any clothes my size." Severus griped and sat down in front of his plate of eggs and potatoes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm a wizard, Snape, I'll shrink them to fit." Harry retorted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He climbed the stairs quickly and found himself a pair of jeans and a shirt to slip into. It was becoming painfully obvious that his lack of clothes was going to hinder him. But finding something for Severus Snape proved to be a challenge. He knew that Snape wore nothing but black, certainly not jeans, but his wardrobe was suddenly and woefully full of color.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cursing vehemently, and promising to take Snape shopping soon, Harry grabbed the first two things he could lay hands on.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Here," he panted when he managed to get back into the kitchen. "Put 'em on."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus gripped the jeans in one tight fist, the blue shirt was grasped in the other hand. "Right here?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry huffed, "do I look like I care? Just hurry up, so that I can make them fit." He </span>
  <em>
    <span>accio</span>
  </em>
  <span>-ed his shoes and caught them as they zoomed through the door. "We have to go shopping for food and clothes and shit."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Don't cuss, Potter," Severus said, and Harry looked up from tying his shoes. The boy looked positively terrified as if Harry would be angry that he was being told what to do. "It- it's not polite!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry smiled. Mostly to himself. "No, you're right. Rules were made to be followed after all."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"God, you make it hard to hate you," Snape growled while Harry laughed. "What?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You used to say that a lot. It's good to know that you haven't changed </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> much. C'mon, let's get going so I can make a suitable dinner."</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>We barely remember what came before this precious moment,<br/>Choosing to be here right now. Hold on, stay inside...</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Harry spent over a week getting Severus comfortable in Grimmauld Place, which was no easy task. He changed one of the many rooms into a habitable space, instead of the dust-gathering storage room it had been. Well, almost every room was like that now. Harry liked to call it his own private Order museum, but only to co-workers since both Hermione </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>Draco would backhand him for it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, Harry managed to get the tub in the bathroom on that floor to behave. Though he had to threaten it far too much for him to be satisfied, it seemed to work just fine for Severus. He moved his schedule around so that he was using his paid vacation days first since it would take at least a month to figure out how to handle this. To figure out how long it would last. Normally, a de-aging potion would wear off after twenty-four hours, but Harry had a strange feeling that this wasn't the cause of a potion. Ultimately, he needed Snape to open up to him more, so he could get to the bottom of all this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was one place in the whole house that Severus was truly relaxed, and Harry capitalized on it as much as he could. The first time he brought the child into the library, Severus passed out soundly and Harry had to carry him to bed. So, any time Harry had enough of the childish bickering he was forced to endure, he sat Severus on the couch with a book. And Severus took to it well. Slowly, the boy started trusting Harry. Enough to request his help.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So, Harry thought it was a good idea to revisit the past.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Severus, I have a difficult question to ask, and I would like it if you could hear me out before yelling at me. Okay?" Harry asked on the last night of the first week.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus, who had been previously busy with his latest read, met his eyes from across the library. "That depends on the line of questioning, doesn't it?" Harry gaped at him. For one moment, there was a glimmer of the older Snape in those endlessly black eyes. It was like seeing a ghost that quickly disappeared behind a veil of mistrust. "Stop staring," Severus muttered and looked down, his hair falling over his face to help him hide.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry shook his head and bit his lip. No, it was just the ghost. "Er, right. I was wondering if you remember the wars."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Which one?" Severus asked as if he'd seen quite a few. "I remember Lily's death and your birth, and I remember teaching at Hogwarts, but I think it ends when you arrive for your first year."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry wrote it down in his notebook and nodded. "So then, do you remember our first real meeting?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No. My memory ends that night. And Quirrell was a very annoying person, I must have been trying to sabotage him because I don't think I trusted him." Severus shook his head. "I just remember your eyes and your scar."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry deflated, he didn't want to be the person to recount the whole nine or ten years since. And the last months of the second war had been dark indeed, this young mind shouldn't be burdened by it. No. Harry's whole life had been unsurpassable darkness. It only culminated in a violent end because he had been too blind and couldn't tell when he was being lied to. Dumbledore had spent too much time shielding him from the inevitable, he had to break the cycle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"A lot happened after that, and when you think you are ready, I will tell you whatever you want to know. But keep in mind that it was bad, and I'm not proud of myself in the end." He said. He kept his eyes on Severus' so the boy could see for himself, what Harry had done, what he had to do, what he still did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I know I died," Severus said with a finality that scared Harry. "It was to keep you safe. Stop treating me like I'm made of glass."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry blinked away the tears that sprang to his eyes. No, Severus did </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>remember how Harry had cried, the fight to keep the blood from flowing, Harry's screams when that familiar grasp fell limp. He did not remember how fast Harry had run to his aid, nor how he had begged for Severus to stay,</span>
  <em>
    <span> just stay, stay with me, I love you-</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He had to close his eyes so the images wouldn't play out in his real world.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Hey, let's go get some ice cream." He announced suddenly, desperate to keep his own memories and feelings at bay. This wasn't about him and what he lost, this was about Severus.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Severus' happy face when Harry put a bowl of chocolate chip ice cream in front of him was enough of a reminder of the past</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This body holding me, reminding me that I am not alone in<br/>This body makes me feel eternal. All this pain is an illusion.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>"He's the same as he always has been, but I managed to get him to eat and read more," Harry said as he led Draco, Hermione, and Ron up the stairs. Draco was here to help him figure out what had happened, while Ron and Hermione had popped in unexpectedly for lunch. "I need more books on resurrection spells, I keep hitting a dead-end in the school-approved material. Severus says that this would be something likely to be found in your libraries, he even mentioned Lucius for a second before remembering."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Of course, I will take a look. I threw out much of my father's works, for reasons that we shouldn't discuss, but I will go over them as well." Draco muttered. "Potter, what else does he remember?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Not much." Harry sighed. "I keep poking and prodding, but he keeps to himself still. As if he's trying to understand it himself, before letting me help."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Nothing has changed then." Draco smiled to himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No, not really." Harry agreed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So then, he still hates you," Hermione said, rubbing his shoulder reassuringly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sometimes, but there are some moments where I can see </span>
  <em>
    <span>him.</span>
  </em>
  <span> I would like to think that it's just my imagination," Harry sighed again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"But?" Draco prodded him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked at his cousin, then at his friends. "He stopped calling me 'Potter.' Again. It's like those last months are happening all over again. Sometimes he recognizes me, I mean, further than as Lily's son. Other times, he's mean and distant. Like his old self really."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Then that's good," Ron piped in cheerily. "Right?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I dunno." Harry sighed. He never told his friends about his relationship with Severus </span>
  <em>
    <span>after</span>
  </em>
  <span> they left Hogwarts. It was his only secret, and now, he still wasn't sure he wanted to tell them. Draco met his eyes for a fraction of a second, and whatever he read there, he kept to himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I think it might be time to talk about his death then." Hermione surmised. "If he remembers our first years at Hogwarts, it's only a matter of time. He deserves to know."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"He remembers," Harry reported, running his hands over his face. He was tired, and it was finally catching up to him. "He said not to be gentle with him, so I imagine that he remembers the whole ordeal."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That's terrible, mate." Ron shook his head and Harry nodded. The red-head had been at his side throughout the war, had to pull Harry off the dying body when nothing would budge him. Ron had </span>
  <em>
    <span>seen</span>
  </em>
  <span> exactly what had happened to Severus Snape, so it was no small feat that Harry's best friend felt empathy for the child upstairs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Where is he?" Hermione asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"In his room. I had him go up before Draco arrived, he doesn't need to know that there may not be a cure." Harry explained.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'll go get him." Draco offered and made his way up the stairs, leaving Hermione and Ron alone with Harry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The silence fell uncomfortably, they hadn't had this amount of privacy since 1998, two whole years of almost silence between them. Last Harry had heard, his friends were getting married. And he was still stuck on Severus, no matter which way he sliced it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Harry,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No, I know what you guys want to say, okay?" Harry said defensively before Hermione could get her thought through. "I'm not just trying to imprint him on this kid, </span>
  <em>
    <span>someone else</span>
  </em>
  <span> already did that. I just want to fix him."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"But have you considered it, mate?" Ron asked. "That someone might be trying to get to you, through him?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry blinked, Ron was seldom the voice of reason. Even when he fully understood what was going on. Hermione's beaming expression kept her quiet, which Harry thought was very good, the two of them could be a force to reckon with.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I- I don't think-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That's the problem though, you don't always think when it comes to </span>
  <em>
    <span>him.</span>
  </em>
  <span> He riled you up and sent you packing, and then you ended up doing some stupid shit, like back in the school days. Your mind just stops functioning around him, like when 'Mione gets burnt out on work." Ron held up his hands as an apology to his fiancee. "It's just hard to watch."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hermione's hand rested on Harry's arm, and he knew she only meant to console him. But then she opened her mouth. "Harry, were you- and- and Snape- were you-?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No!" Harry answered quickly and she took her hand back as if she had been electrocuted. "No, we were friends. He stopped treating me like I was the shit under his boot, that's all."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Harry, we're your friends," Ron intoned. "I might be blind, but Hermione's not. If you want to keep it to yourself, then that's all you have to say."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry rubbed both of his hands through his hair, making it look more like a bird's nest than ever. He was torn, really. If he said anything, then it was real and it was torn away from him. Dropped back into his lap as cruelly as it had been taken. But if he said nothing-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Dear God, you can't keep looking like that, Harry. It's unsightly." Severus' childlike voice startled him and he hurried to push his feelings away. To lock them up until he could deal with it alone. He faked a laugh and turned to the child that turned his life upside down. He could feel Ron and Hermione’s exchanged worried looks behind his back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yeah, I know. Lemme brush it down, and I'll start lunch, okay?" He said, meeting those very-adult eyes in that very-child face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus sniffed and raised his chin as if he remembered both of Harry's friends but elected to ignore them completely. "Fine then, but I won't eat that slop you call pasta. I don't know where you learned to cook, but I assume it was a very unpleasant place."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Finally,</span>
  </em>
  <span> someone </span>
  <em>
    <span>else</span>
  </em>
  <span> can tell you that no one likes your cooking.” Draco guffawed and Severus gave him a side-glance that left Harry feeling better.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>We barely remember who or what came before this precious moment<br/>We are choosing to be here, right now<br/>Hold on, stay inside<br/>This holy reality<br/>This holy experience</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It was very late, and Harry couldn’t imagine why he would awaken in the dead of the night, but the noises in his room had him rolling over in his bed to grab his glasses.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once they were firmly in place, and he adjusted to the darkness of his room, he could see a small silhouette standing just inside the door. Severus had frozen when Harry awoke so quickly as if he didn't expect to be caught in here at all. They sat there in the dark, staring at each other, while Harry mustered up the capability to speak.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Hey," he murmured softly. As if he were speaking to a spooked animal. "Bad dreams?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus did not move. "Yes."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry pulled back the blankets of his bed and patted the mattress beside him. Severus' dark eyes watched his every move, but he stayed where he was. "C'mon, I'm not going to bite you." Harry coaxed, watching Severus' face contort into hatred and disgust.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You're disgusting, Potter. Of course, you shouldn't bite people! The human mouth is full of bacteria and worms-!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Will you stop thinking and just get in the bed so we can go to sleep?" Harry interrupted with a smile. Severus was more liberal with his words when he was like this, his thoughts came out clear and strong. Being in a child's body must have been a frustrating place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus huffed for a few seconds, and Harry decided that he wouldn't need his glasses after all. He stretched backward to place them on the nightstand, and in that time, Severus had made his decision. The boy crawled up into the bed, while Harry pulled the covers over them again, but he teetered just on the edge. Afraid to get any closer. Harry heaved a heavy sigh and wrapped his free arm around Severus, pulling him to the center of the bed. "You don't have to touch me if you don't want to, but it will be warmer and more comfortable here. Good night." He murmured into the mostly empty room and then put his head on his pillow. He was tired. The sleep he'd been in previously was serene, unlike most of the nights he had in the last two years.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus didn't say anything and Harry fell into that sweet half-state. Somewhere between not-here and here. He jolted when a very cold hand reached out to him under the covers. "Jesus Christ, you're freezing." He hissed and, on instinct, wrapped his body around that cold figure. Severus made a small noise of protest, but he didn't do anything about it. In fact, the boy was folding into Harry's shape.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry fell asleep shortly after that, and when he woke again, it was light outside. He got up quietly so he could visit the bathroom and leaned against the wall as he pissed. When he got back to the bed, Severus still was not awake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But his limbs were long and awkward as Harry tried to arrange them both into a comfortable position, so he gave up. Sitting up against the headboard, he shoved his glasses onto his face. Had Severus </span>
  <em>
    <span>grown</span>
  </em>
  <span> overnight? The body beside him was no longer that of a child barely ten years old, and the dark hair seemed longer almost, thicker.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Quit thinking, Harry." Severus protested. "The sound of your brain whirring is annoying."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And that wasn't the voice of a small child either.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry reached for the pile of books on his desk, he had seen something about this. Something about the slow progression of age, and what magic could do to it. When he got the right book into his hands, he bent over it to flip through pages and then murmured the words to himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>"Normally, aging potions will take longer to dissipate into the bloodstream. This is because it is affecting the very cells of the human body associated with puberty and growth. Ingesting the wrong potion could severely increase the side effects, so one must take care when reading labels."</span>
  </em>
  <span> There was a table of effective potions, but as Harry ran his finger through it, there was nothing to direct him to the answer. All of the examples were rudimentary potions, not anything as advanced as this. Did Severus make it? Was this the 'fail-safe' Snape always talked about during the war? If so, then it was likely that no one would ever find out what was in it. Much less be able to reverse its experimental effects.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Fuck," Harry groaned, closing the book and putting it back on the top of the pile. This eliminated only the most basic answers, and given that a forty-year-old Snape, who was advanced in all things dark, had most likely made the potion, Harry was certain that the progress notes were gone. Or hidden very well within Grimmauld. He would have to turn the whole house out and that was hard to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked down at the newly-grown teenager in his bed, hoping the answer would come to him just by looking at that brilliant head. The sun was finally peeking over the buildings of London, throwing rays into the house at random from all sorts of windows. Harry thought he ought to get up, make breakfast and coffee, come back up if Severus hadn't woken by then.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Honestly, I have like 11 chapters already for this, so I'm gonna try to post every time I finish another chapter.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Choosing to be here in<br/>This body, this body holding me<br/>Be my reminder here that I am not alone in<br/>This body, this body holding me<br/>Feeling eternal, all this pain is an illusion</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Three weeks passed, without another growth spurt, without the answers that Harry so desperately needed. And Severus' demeanor had changed too. No longer was there the quiet child with challenging eyes, who hid the existence of his older self. Severus was now biting and unruly, befitting a teen of his caliber, and Harry found himself in useless arguments more frequently. And his biggest weapons were gone now, Severus didn't care about ice cream or reading anymore. In fact, he had been yelled at each time he suggested either refuge.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>By the end of the month, Harry was at his wits' end.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had called on his cousin more than once to help him understand what was happening to Severus. It helped some, but more often than not, it incited some other rage inside Severus that Harry had no idea could come from anyone, let alone someone with such a small frame. Draco would shrug on those days, neither of them knew what to do, or what was safe to talk about. But after the fifth time he called and Severus exploded even further, Harry gave up trying to get help. He had to accept that Severus was angry, and he had nearly every right to be. Harry remembered trashing Dumbledore's office in one of his own rage fits. He aspired to be as calm as his former Headmaster and Mentor in the face of such unbridled fury. So it was no surprise when he walked in after shopping to an eerily quiet house. This was always the precursor, like the calm before a violent storm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hoped he wouldn't run into Severus, he had no desire to fight again. No matter what the subject and they had been varied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he managed to put away the groceries, and get a jump start on dinner, with little issues. Tonight, he was making something easy. He was too tired to muster up the will for much more than a pasta dish, but he made damn certain that the noodles were cooked all the way.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was setting the table when he heard the kitchen door open. "You're home," Severus said. Harry tried to smile through the haze of exhaustion creeping upon him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yeah, the grocer's was pretty full so I got out as soon as I could." Harry's hands shook when he went to put down their plates, the china clinked uncomfortably in the large room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus took the plates from him and the teen's other hand took the silverware. "You look tired."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry wanted to snap back, but there was a calm that had descended suddenly, and he didn't want to give that up. "I am." He said instead and turned to the work on the stove. He could hear Severus putting dishes down on the table, and breathed out a silent sigh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Why are you so tired? You hardly do anything around here." Severus asked, and the tone of his voice rubbed Harry the wrong way.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I've just not been sleeping well," Harry grumbled into the pasta.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Weird dreams?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry turned to look over his shoulder, </span>
  <em>
    <span>where was this leading?</span>
  </em>
  <span> "You could say that…" In fact, his dreams were getting crazier than they ever were during his school days, when he was connected to Voldemort's mind. Back then, though, all of his dreams ended in death. These new ones were… on a </span>
  <em>
    <span>whole</span>
  </em>
  <span> other level.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Me too, really weird ones," Severus admitted and Harry's brain picked up on his choice of words. It sounded like Severus wanted to talk about it, but Harry knew that all it took was one misstep and Severus would take flight again. And Harry had </span>
  <em>
    <span>no desire whatsoever</span>
  </em>
  <span> to set him off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I had one last night," Harry started, careful. "It was pretty bad actually."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"If you want to share, then you should find a support group, Potter. I have no wish to interpret your insane dreams." Severus retorted viciously and Harry yielded.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Alright, but if you want to talk about yours, I don't mind going to get my Divination text. It's supposed to be accurate, so it might help. At least, a little." He said, nodding. The kitchen went silent and Harry had to check to see if Severus had left without any other word. No, but it wouldn't be long before Harry was in a corner he couldn't back out of, Severus' face told him as much. "Sometimes, it's cathartic to talk about stuff," Harry muttered, trying to save himself. Severus stayed silent, and Harry dished out a nice chicken marsala, they ate in relative silence. And while Severus was busy eating, Harry took the time to observe the teen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was thinner than before as if his body just would </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> retain the nutrients that Harry was practically pumping into him. The black hair was lanky too, but it framed that face awkwardly. Maybe Severus was still trying to find his style. Harry doubted it though, he'd seen enough kids with absent or non-existent parents and all of them were thin.  He knew that Eileen Snape tried her best under the circumstances, but it was obvious that Severus' father was very distant. Even from the memories he illegally previewed in Snape's Pensieve, it was easy to see how Severus could be neglected.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>How it pertained to </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span> version of teenage Snape was still a mystery.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So…" Harry began after a few minutes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus cut him off easily. "Tell me about the relationship that I have with you. I can tell that you are an idiot, and a </span>
  <em>
    <span>Gryffindor,</span>
  </em>
  <span> so how the hell did we become friends?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry let his fork fall onto his plate, the metal clanged sharply against the ceramic, and he just stared at the teen. Who was mindlessly chewing his food, avoiding Harry's eyes as if </span>
  <em>
    <span>he</span>
  </em>
  <span> were the Legilimens? What should he say?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You don't have to tell me," Severus muttered testily. He pushed his chicken around while he spoke. "But I'll find out eventually."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No!" Harry said too quickly and too loud. "Er, I mean, I could tell you. But it's- it's awkward."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus finally looked up at him. "As if this isn't?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His blush was hot on his skin, Harry couldn't say anything while holding eye contact. Not ever telling </span>
  <em>
    <span>anyone</span>
  </em>
  <span> was probably the worst thing he could have done, he couldn't even imagine what he should say. That they </span>
  <em>
    <span>weren't</span>
  </em>
  <span> friends? That he </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn't</span>
  </em>
  <span> fall for the only man who ever really cared about him? What if he lost Severus now by telling him? How would anything be fixed if Harry lost him now? His mouth closed, his teeth clicking shut, and he raised his chin. The old Severus would </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> want him to keep it to himself. "We were lost in battle," Harry started and Severus' eyes fixed on his, daring him to lie. "Voldemort had been on us for months, while I was still stupidly obsessed with the Hallows. I had to get the wand, it was almost our last hope, and he already had you cornered. So I had to make a choice."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Between me and the wand." Severus broke in as if it was coming back to him as Harry spoke. And maybe it was because it still felt like yesterday to Harry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He swallowed. "Yeah,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You chose me, you </span>
  <em>
    <span>idiot.</span>
  </em>
  <span>" The teen spat vehemently. "And then you had the nerve to tell me that it would be okay, we would get another chance at it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"And we </span>
  <em>
    <span>did,</span>
  </em>
  <span> which I was thankful for."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"That doesn't explain our relationship. You may have sacrificed the Elder Wand, but that doesn't mean I would have </span>
  <em>
    <span>feelings</span>
  </em>
  <span> for you after something so stupid." Severus pointed out; but for Harry, </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> had been the change. "Did you hex me?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The accusation in Severus' voice made Harry's skin crawl; no, he would never force someone to slip into his bed. And he said as much, making the younger wizard flush red. "You fucking came onto me, you little shit. I was </span>
  <em>
    <span>trying,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Severus! I thought that you would skin me if you ever found out, I was on the verge of panic </span>
  <em>
    <span>every</span>
  </em>
  <span> time you walked into the room." Harry huffed. "Don't treat me like I </span>
  <em>
    <span>forced</span>
  </em>
  <span> you to do anything. Not that I could."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus was stunned, it was written plain across his face. If Harry had a better understanding of the old Severus, he might have been able to help the new one. But he didn't so he kept his mouth shut and waited for the ringing of his voice to go away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm sorry," he said and picked up their now-empty plates to wash them by hand. "I didn't tell anyone, not ever. You always valued your privacy and I loved you too much to anger you, even after you were dead."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You </span>
  <em>
    <span>loved</span>
  </em>
  <span> me?" Severus asked incredulously, and he slammed a hand against the table. "I treated you like shit, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>you loved me.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Didn't you think I was punished enough? That maybe, I could have been playing along to keep you from killing yourself? It was a war, Potter, no </span>
  <em>
    <span>love</span>
  </em>
  <span> can be bred out of bloodshed and violence."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry shook his head because he remembered </span>
  <em>
    <span>a lot </span>
  </em>
  <span>more than Severus did. The teen had admitted as much by asking about </span>
  <em>
    <span>them.</span>
  </em>
  <span> "You don't know what it was like," he said, and he sounded calm. Certain. "You don't remember what it was like to be in a foxhole, praying that you don't get caught, praying you don't die the next morning. You don't remember what it was like to watch that snake rip you apart and not be </span>
  <em>
    <span>able</span>
  </em>
  <span> to do anything."</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In this holy reality<br/>In this holy experience<br/>Choosing to be here in<br/>This body, this body holding me<br/>Be my reminder here that I am not alone in<br/>This body, this body holding me<br/>Feeling eternal, all this pain is an illusion</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>"Give me that screwdriver,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"This one?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"The other one, these screws have a tiny head."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Here,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Awesome,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So, I notice he's bigger."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yeah? He just came down like that one morning, almost gave me a heart attack. He's so skinny."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You been feedin' 'im?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Do I look like my fucking relatives? Of course!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So he's just not putting on the pounds? Hermione says there's a condition common among teens, something like genetic algorithms or whatever, it makes them metabolize differently. Maybe he needs more protein."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Maybe you and Hermione ought to be looking at early development since you're both </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> interested in how I'm taking care of Severus."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sick, mate. Is that what you do during your free time? Think about me and 'Mione makin' kids?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Merlin, no! I was saying you two ought to create your own business to be sticking noses in. Y'know? Give Molly those grandbabies she wants so badly?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Eh, Mum's got another hundred years. She can wait for George or Percy to pop some out. 'Mione wants to finish her education and get settled at work, then we'll </span>
  <em>
    <span>think</span>
  </em>
  <span> about it."</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Silence.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"So, speaking of Mum…"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I can't do another family dinner without bringing Severus, last time was different. He was younger and slept more."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No, that's the thing. She wants you to bring him, so she can meet him again."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"How does she know who he is?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"'Mione said something, and you know Mum. She heard the name and didn't let go until we coughed it up. It was kind of disturbing. She even came into my room when she thought we were talking about it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What were you doing instead?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What do you think, you tosspot! Needless to say, my fiance won't be caught with me alone in that house anymore."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"God, you two are like shameless monkeys."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Hey, we </span>
  <em>
    <span>survived.</span>
  </em>
  <span> I say that gives us the freedom to bugger whomever, wherever we desire. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Especially</span>
  </em>
  <span> in our own rooms!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Fair enough. I don't think I share your enthusiasm."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"C'mon, Harry! You can't tell me you haven't gone out to pick yourself a tall, handsome gent. I've </span>
  <em>
    <span>seen </span>
  </em>
  <span>you checking out guys before, y'know? You don't have to overreact."</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>"Ron!"</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"Mate, you don't spend seven years in the same dorm with a guy and </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> learn something. You kept us on our toes though, neither of us expected Chang to just </span>
  <em>
    <span>molest</span>
  </em>
  <span> you in that room, but I suspected you would try your hand with Macmillan."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Why in Merlin's name were you both </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> interested in my love life?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Harry, you have no idea how many of those chocolates I had to eat. If not for Romilda Vane, you probably would never know I was checking all your mail. Something like that came in </span>
  <em>
    <span>every day</span>
  </em>
  <span> for a </span>
  <em>
    <span>week,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Hermione just started burning them by the end of it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Why am I suddenly the bad guy in this story?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You're missing my point, you need to get out. Go find someone to relieve your stress, and just fucking forget about the kid for a while, you still have a life to live, mate."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I don't </span>
  <em>
    <span>want</span>
  </em>
  <span> to, I'm content with my life as it is right now. I don't need some guy to come and wreck it."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Then why are you repairing this fucking table? Why are you asking me to help you? You </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> I don't know the difference between one Muggle contraption and another, and you have me handling a </span>
  <em>
    <span>lot</span>
  </em>
  <span> of them!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I don't know, Ron!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Lame excuse!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Fuck you, mate. I asked you to help me because I can't fucking reach THE GODDAMN TOOLS!!" There was a </span>
  <em>
    <span>bang!</span>
  </em>
  <span> and Harry emerged red-faced, huffing, and ripe for explosion. He held his head where he smacked it and looked up at his best friend. "I don't want to go out, I don't want to leave him alone."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Harry, he lived alone for forty years."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I know! But, can't I make a difference? Is it so hard to believe that I don't want him to suffer like that?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What happened between you two? You never cared about him before the war, he hated you almost as much as he hated your dad. He nearly </span>
  <em>
    <span>killed</span>
  </em>
  <span> us in Albania! Why are you protecting him?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Ron, I- I can't. I-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Fine, you won't tell me, you won't tell 'Mione. You'll hole yourself up and try to save him, but you know it's not going to work. Whatever you're hiding better be worth losing your friends, I can't deal with this anymore. You've gone and cracked."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I haven't cracked! You keep pushing the issue and I already said what I need to say. So go ahead and report back to everyone that I'm off my head and can't be trusted to even make myself a cup of tea! I'm not going to abandon him, and if you guys have a problem with that, then you should leave."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"He's fucking changed you, Harry."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry watched his fiery friend leave and then got up to pull the toolbox onto the floor for better access. He heard the front door slam as he laid back and continued his work. But the tool wasn't fitting into the screw, and he was already on his back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally, he boiled over. He let out a frustrated scream, threw the tool away from him, and banged his fist into the floor. The walls shook from the force. He screamed again because the first one wasn't enough, and his voice left behind echoes, ringing in the enclosed space under the table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Harry?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He started, he didn't expect Severus to be in the room. Crawling out, he met the teen's dark eyes and smiled anyway. "Hey, how much of that did you hear?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Both of you were yelling, so I could hear a bit. The rest I can infer." Severus said, guarded. Harry furrowed his brows.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What do you mean?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I agree with your friend, you don't have to stay here every day."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry's throat tightened. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Not you too.</span>
  </em>
  <span> "I know I don't, Severus. I choose to, every single day, I choose to give you what you deserve from me. And if that means that I have to stay here until you disappear, then you better believe that I will."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Is-is there anything you want from me? Can I help you in some way?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No, I don't think you should burden yourself with that. You have enough to go through. I can manage, I promise."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Harry, don't be such a fool. You are deteriorating, you shouldn't even be working on that right now. Let me help you like you are helping me." Severus' little face was as sincere as his teenage-self could be, and Harry felt his heart breaking slowly as he looked. The old Severus hadn't even waited for him to ask, he just thrust the help upon Harry until he accepted it, and then continued looking stoic. He never knew that </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span> was what Severus was feeling inside, and he suddenly wished he knew Snape better than he did.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Twirling round with this familiar parable...</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, so I haven't done another chapter yet, but it's because I'm doing some extra work on the side.<br/>Which is why I am letting everyone who is subbed to this story that I will, and do, have more, but I just have too much on my plate to be writing notes AND writing fanfiction at the same time. So, once I have my new project finished, I will put out more words for you guys.<br/>For anyone who is curious (I imagine my ambiguity is causing some questions), I am going to be making virtual tours on Youtube so I can monetize what I do with my editing skills. The first one is an extensive episode about Chernobyl, probably going to be a long one, because my notes are upwards of four pages long now. I can post a link in the A/N on the next chapter if anyone is interested.<br/>And if you are interested in my editing skills, you can find me on Youtube under the same name (Cosmic Boredom) and you can see all the other videos that I have made.<br/>Toodle-loo everyone! I'll see you once I resurface from the Ukrainian USSR!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Harry must've been dreaming.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was the only explanation for it, otherwise, those large hands burrowing under the layers of his clothes would be cold and still. And they would be reaching for his face; or was that another dream that he'd had? No, this was the dream, and those hands were </span>
  <em>
    <span>warm and alive.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry squirmed. It was taking too long, he wanted to be naked, </span>
  <em>
    <span>right now,</span>
  </em>
  <span> under those hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>"Severusssssss…."</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"Shut up, boy. Do you </span>
  <em>
    <span>want </span>
  </em>
  <span>them to hear us?" It was hissed into his ear, and the sound went straight to his cock, leaving no doubt about what he </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> wanted. "Did I fucking stutter?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry pressed up and his belly met hard flesh, muscle. God, he missed this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Look at you,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The whispers were coming from all around him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"So open,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"All mine,"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Spread your legs,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Only mine…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>One of those burning hands slipped under his waistband, and he let out a choked moan, only just barely able to cut off the full sound of it. And then his eyes flew open-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was back in Grimmauld, with his scratchy sheets and the sound of a storm beating down the roof. The whispers followed him into the waking world Drenched in sweat, he kicked the rest of the blankets off and curled up with the second pillow. It used to have Snape's scent, earthy like the potions he brewed, but now it smelled like cold air. He drew in shaky breaths, willing his heart to slow, and trying desperately to not cry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lightning flickered through the windows, and he could see a thin figure in his doorway. The thunder followed like the low growl of a werewolf, and Harry tried to pull himself together. But seeing the new version of what he lost was too much for him, the camel's back finally broke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Harry?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Don't, not tonight. Please."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even as he said the words, he opened his bed and arms for the teen to slide in, and Severus did so without a second invitation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You were crying."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Bad dreams again." Harry sniffed, and he wiped his tears away before pulling the smaller body into his own.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"It was about me, wasn't it?" Severus asked once they settled in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry hesitated, he should say no.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"It's okay. I won't leave you again." Severus murmured before he could answer. "I wouldn't have left if it wasn't for a very good reason." Harry squeezed his eyes shut and buried his face in the long locks of Severus' hair. At least this smell never changed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then morning came swiftly, the storm left behind a mist that seemed to seep through the windows, creating a chill that Harry hated. It reminded him of those lazy mornings that he couldn’t have anymore. The ones where his feet would tangle with Snape’s and their breath would mingle under the blankets to keep them warm. Sometimes, Snape would have curled around him to shield him with body heat, and others Harry would awaken to a hot mug of coffee. Both memories made his heart ache, as it did </span>
  <em>
    <span>every time</span>
  </em>
  <span> days such as this would come around, but he powered through it and got out of bed. The small body he left behind, the ghost of </span>
  <em>
    <span>his</span>
  </em>
  <span> Severus Snape, rolled into the warm space where Harry had been.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>That</span>
  </em>
  <span> made his heart hurt all the more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The cold had him rushing through the making of coffee, since he hadn’t thought of putting on any extra layers, and he was ridiculously overjoyed to hold a hot cup as he made his way back to his room. That was until he noticed that there was an open door on the second floor. He stopped in his tracks, peering into the dark room. The second floor used to belong to three people during the war; Emilene Fairchild, Fredrick Mastle, and Severus Snape. And while he barely knew who the other two were, he had visited the second floor too often to forget whose room was opened. The younger Severus must have been inside, must have seen what his former self used to covet and hide.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He sighed and closed the door, turning to step onto the stairs again. He missed it when the door creaked open again, like a dark mouth waiting to swallow them all.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Spinning, weaving round each new experience...</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So I have finished my notes... a month later.<br/>And I have a new chapter to share! Have fun everyone!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>"What is all of this?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry half-turned from the reports he had to pick up, the office couldn't handle itself for more than a few months without his supervision. Severus was holding a parcel, about a foot all around, and was about to shake it. "No, wait! If we dunno what it is, it could explode." He said as quickly as he could and Severus paled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Take it," the younger male practically screamed and Harry was forced to catch it as Severus took cover behind the couch of the library.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Where did it come from?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus' voice was slightly muffled as he answered. "My old room."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry's heart did a few somersaults; the box could be anything from the cure to their current predicament to a box full of doxies. The older Severus wasn't likely to hide anything of value in that room, but Harry had been surprised before. He held the box gingerly as his breathing sped up and lights danced at the edges of his vision. What if there was something </span>
  <em>
    <span>else</span>
  </em>
  <span> in here? Was it supposed to be only for him, then? And if so, what harm would it do to the version of Severus existing in that room? What if it was a love letter? Or some sort of sex tape that Severus had managed to make and hide?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Open it already!" A real voice told him, not the low growl that presided in his head non-stop. His fingers and hands shook as he tore the wrapping off and opened the lid of the box.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yes, there was a letter, signed and dated in Severus' elegant script. But there was more in the box than he expected; vials full of undeterminable plants and organs, a mortar and pestle that hadn't had a chance to be cleaned, and a notebook. He put the letter down, he didn't want to read it yet, and carefully pulled the book out. This must be Severus' experimental potions kit, Harry could see the folded-steel knife that he had bought for Severus lying to the side of all the jars.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He flipped through the notebook, it was small, like a journal. But it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>full.</span>
  </em>
  <span> There was not a single page untouched.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry touched the writing, the ink was dry and it was old now, but he could feel the power of Severus' words coming straight off the paper. It was almost like the man was there with him, watching him read from over his shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Now, remember how I taught you to crush the beans? You'll want to do the same with these chestnuts.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>These measurements are too lethal, try reducing the amount of Perillion fang.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I can't even imagine how hard your brain must be working, can you even read my handwriting?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yes, I can." Harry murmured to himself- no, to the version of Snape that only lived in his memory. He kept reading until he was forced to sit, and even then, the voice in his head was helping him understand what he couldn't grasp by himself. "These are blueprints…"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"They're </span>
  <em>
    <span>what?</span>
  </em>
  <span> Blueprints for what?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry blinked as he came back around to reality, the </span>
  <em>
    <span>new</span>
  </em>
  <span> Severus was no longer hiding since the package hadn't blown them sky-high.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You trust me and my things too much. I could have done that, but you wouldn't have been very nice to me if this came to be like I hoped it would.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>"This is your old work," Harry said out loud, smiling as he passed the book to its owner. "You used to test some of these things on me for fun."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus' eyes widened as he went through the book. "Oh my god, why would I put you in this kind of harm?" He asked, disbelieving. "Half of these ingredients could kill you!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry chuckled to himself, of course, Severus' younger self would be too afraid to take these types of risks. "Well, sometimes I </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span> dying, so it wasn't like you were </span>
  <em>
    <span>trying</span>
  </em>
  <span> to speed that along. My tolerance for certain base-level potions became too high, a direct result of being injured at school so often, so you had to come up with some wild answers."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"There's a potion specifically made to kill you! Only you! What kind of shit did you put me through?" Harry frowned, he didn't know that Severus had been serious when Harry asked him to find a way to kill him. Or more specifically, the Horcrux </span>
  <em>
    <span>inside</span>
  </em>
  <span> him. Harry would have walked away just like he had when he took a straight hit from the Killing Curse, but Severus never wanted to try. And that had been their downfall. "Harry? It's here." Younger Severus' voice broke into his dark thoughts. He frowned again, but out of confusion this time. "This is the potion I made before we went into the final battle."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry took the book back and hidden in the last pages, there was a note; </span>
  <em>
    <span>emergency only.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He stood up. "Merlin's pants." He exclaimed as he read the steps. "MERLIN'S PANTS! We have to firecall Draco!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Two hours later, Harry was entertaining a two-year-old and an infant while Severus and Draco poured through the notebook. For a long moment, he thought bitterly that he had been given the hard job, but that was because he couldn't get Scorpius to calm down. And once he did (Scorpius hadn't been fed yet and Draco thought it wasn't important information to give him), it was smooth sailing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>From the glances he'd been able to steal of Severus' face, the notebook was proving to be a longer, more difficult puzzle than heating up a bottle of milk. But more often than not, he could see the teen watching him and Teddy play. Harry realized that Severus had only seen the Lupin child once, he smiled as he remembered Teddy's tuft of hair turning black as night when the two met. The sheer shock in Severus' eyes as something small and innocent started to adore him. Now, Teddy's hair was a weird mixture of platinum blonde and jet black, signifying his love for both Harry </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>Draco. As if Severus had never existed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whether or not that would continue was up to their new Severus.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Come on over," Harry called after catching Severus looking over for the millionth time. “We don’t bite.” Severus rolled his eyes while Harry suppressed a smile, the teen would give in eventually. Teddy pulled on his shirt sleeve and he reached out to grab the toddler’s hand before he could fall, and Severus suddenly sat down beside him. The toddler reached out for Severus, amazed, and grasping for his pant leg.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry readjusted his hold on Scorpius and stood up, his leg was </span>
  <em>
    <span>killing </span>
  </em>
  <span>him for sitting on the floor. Tomorrow, he would be walking funny for all the wrong reasons. “You’re not leaving me with him!” Severus hissed, and there was a thinly-hid panic in his voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry let out a short laugh as he stretched with the baby in his arms. So many children in one place, and still Severus was a fish out of water. “I won’t,” He groaned as his bones settled back into place. It wasn’t that he was old, he could still do things that a forty-year-old would balk at, but his part in the war hadn’t been easy on him.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Recognize this as a holy gift...</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Harry actually had to go into the office to sort out an issue between the Muggle Artifacts department and the Department of Magical Creatures, so he brought Severus along. If only to sit in Harry's office. It wasn't that he didn't trust Severus at home, more that he didn't want to miss out if there was another leap, another growth spurt.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In the end, Severus followed him throughout the Ministry, watching him yell at people and demand his way through the problem. There was even a point where Harry's fuse had been so short that he barked at </span>
  <em>
    <span>everyone</span>
  </em>
  <span> in his way. Including Ron, who had done nothing more than saying hello to him at the wrong moment. And when he'd fumed and burned his way, </span>
  <em>
    <span>finally,</span>
  </em>
  <span> to his own office, his voice was starting to break from all the 'political tape' he had to go through.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There was another pile of work on his desk, and he slammed the door back open without thinking. "Davers, I swear to </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything holy</span>
  </em>
  <span> that if your reports include </span>
  <em>
    <span>any</span>
  </em>
  <span> Muggle Artifacts, I will make you present the use of a </span>
  <em>
    <span>maggot</span>
  </em>
  <span> to the Minister!" He roared to the many desks sitting just outside. Hurly Davers, a scrawny-looking eighteen-year-old with odd dirty blonde hair and a lisp, scuttled into the room and picked out at least five reports. Harry slammed the door back closed after Davers slinked by him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He turned back to see Severus staring at him with a calculating look. "What? You've said worse to </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span>."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Severus just shook his head, as if the thought wasn't appropriate. Instead, he said; "Seems like this place is a wreck without you."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s not exactly true,” Harry sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. Severus' face told him that he wasn't hiding the truth very well, the whole of the Ministry sat on his shoulders and had been referring to him since Fudge was voted out. It was like the old classic tale of Atlas, who endured under the weight of everything. “Kingsley can take care of it but I don’t like bothering him.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>That,</span>
  </em>
  <span> at least, was true. Kingsley had been in the Ministry for Harry’s whole life, he probably knew things that Harry was only glimpsing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hmm…” Severus hummed. “When are we going home? Obviously, you aren’t needed anymore, you can leave whenever you’d like.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I have one thing left to do here, and you will stay in here until I return,” Harry muttered and went to his desk to collect the rest of the reports. He shrunk them and put them in his jacket pocket.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What am I going to do while you are gone?” Severus asked incredulously. “It’d be better for me to go along and then we could leave almost immediately afterward.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry straightened his back and frowned, like every other time he had to put his foot down, to draw the line with Severus and his new, clingy self. There was a change in the teen also, but it wasn’t to fight, Severus seemed to deflate, actually. “I would like for you to come with, believe me, I don’t like the idea of leaving you alone anywhere. But the Department of Mysteries has a strict policy. I honestly shouldn’t even be doing this in the first place, losing you to the foster system is one hell of a price to pay for being found out asking questions. You matter more than anyone knows and I’m not risking that.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry’s speech sunk in and Severus looked even more confused than before.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ll be back soon, I promise. Just trust me.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“This is one of the last in existence, Potter. Try not to fuck it up.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What are you going to do if they find out it’s missing?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s my business. How long are you going to stand there with that stupid look? It’s not going to explode.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, I have a history of things going wrong. How do I know this is the </span>
  <em>
    <span>real</span>
  </em>
  <span> one, and you aren’t just gunning for a promotion? I’ve never known you to be a very helpful Undesirable.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re holding a man with great potential in your office, this is enough of a payment to the debt I owe him. When will he get better?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s classified information, need to know.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Potter….”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Look, I don’t even know if this will work. I have only two things going for me, the fact that Malfoy said it would and my unimaginable luck. If that’s not enough for you, then I dunno what to tell you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fine, do you at least know what you are doing?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Malfoy does,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And you </span>
  <em>
    <span>trust</span>
  </em>
  <span> him?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He </span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span> my cousin, Haywood. Do you trust Fawley with every little detail of your experiments?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mostly, but I trust my husband more because I can throw him farther. Point is, you have to watch your back while trying magically experimental potions. Not everyone can save you, except yourself.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How about I throw </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> clear across the room?! I don’t need a lecture on </span>
  <em>
    <span>trusting people</span>
  </em>
  <span> since I’m not the one who dated a fucking KGB agent.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Low blows are not your strong point.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Piss off, I gotta get back before he gets restless. I have some sensitive material in my office.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Porn isn’t new, Potter. Everyone buys a mag once in a while...”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“... I meant cases.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“... Right. Go, before he finds the Horatio file.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Severus was sitting behind the desk when Harry managed to sneak back, rolling a pencil across the top that kept rolling back, looking overall bored and petulant about that fact. He barely lifted his eyes when Harry closed the door audibly. "So, can we go already?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Yes," Harry sighed, then smirked. "Want to get takeout for dinner?"</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Celebrate this chance to be alive and breathing...</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Harry had </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> been good at brewing potions, no matter what Snape and Draco had tried to do to help him understand. But Severus didn't have the magical fortitude to brew something like this, and Draco didn't have the time to experiment with the ingredients. They were forced to reproduce the original potion, without </span>
  <em>
    <span>any</span>
  </em>
  <span> measurements, so Draco could analyze it to create an antidote. That meant that Harry had to be the one to follow Snape's impossibly meticulous method, to rediscover </span>
  <em>
    <span>exactly</span>
  </em>
  <span> how it was done.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And he was freaking the fuck out.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Honestly, Snape's mind was a mystery and a half, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> knew what the man was thinking. </span>
  <em>
    <span>How</span>
  </em>
  <span> his thoughts worked. Harry was prone to chaos, and there was never a plan he couldn't fuck up, this was the very thing that would ultimately set them back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>So, Harry spent a week pouring over the notes until they were ingrained into his mind. Until he could recite the </span>
  <em>
    <span>entire</span>
  </em>
  <span> procedure whilst doing menial chores. If he was going to be the one who ruined the whole thing, then he was going to know how to fix it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Finally, it came to the point where he was sleeping with the damn book. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Again.</span>
  </em>
  <span> As if the Prince's textbook wasn't enough, it seemed Harry had fallen for yet another facet of the nebula that was Severus Snape. Even brought it into his bed, like every time before. Perhaps </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span> was why he had done the unthinkable, by stepping over that line of fantasy and reality. This was why he had to have the real thing, to take it for himself, as selfishly as Snape always painted him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But he was starting to realize that he wasn't the only selfish one.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Are you asleep?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Not anymore, bad dreams again?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>"No…."</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry pulled back his covers, this was becoming a routine as weird as that sounded. Severus would just </span>
  <em>
    <span>appear</span>
  </em>
  <span> out of the darkness and he would provide a safe place, by just laying there. Sometimes they would talk, talk until they both passed out from exhaustion. Severus would go first, his smaller body just couldn't handle the few hours that Harry usually slept. Other times, Harry wouldn't sleep at all, and they wouldn't talk either, but Severus would still sleep. Better and quieter than the other nights.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Tonight </span>
  <em>
    <span>felt</span>
  </em>
  <span> like a night to talk, but Severus was absolutely silent as he stared at Harry in the darkness of the bed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry stared back, but only because that might make the teen stop. And it did, but instead, Severus opened his mouth to speak. Whatever it was, it was creating some sort of anxiety in the younger wizard that Harry hadn't seen for a long time.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"What is it, Severus?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The teen pursed his lips before letting out a sigh. "Can you- </span>
  <em>
    <span>will</span>
  </em>
  <span> you- forgive me if I leave after?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry felt the air thicken around them. "You know I couldn't hold it against you,"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"But you would still be hurt."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Of course I would. But what I want doesn't matter, does it?" Severus didn't meet his eyes for a long moment. And Harry thought that was the end of the conversation, that Severus wanted to hold onto the thoughts in his head. He took a deep breath and curled around the smaller body in his bed. "You already knew I would say that."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Yes, I should say that I'm beginning to know you very well. You would suffer, but you would be happy about it." Severus grumbled somewhat viciously. "I will leave and you will continue to be alone, even though you could just forget about me and move on. You could have kids, a nice witch, or a wizard to keep you warm at night. But you won't because you don't let go that easy."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Sounds about right." Harry murmured.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I wish you weren't so stubborn."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Why?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I might love you less."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry's heart stopped. Just like that first time, when </span>
  <em>
    <span>he</span>
  </em>
  <span> had been the one to let it slip. To say those words if not exactly in that way. It made him so scared, hoping against hope that his mouth hadn't just betrayed him, waiting for Severus' devastating response.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>We are both dying, Harry. And you are too young to fall in love with a wreck like me.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Severus looked similarly stricken. Harry had to pull himself together for the sake of this little heart he was holding. He took another deep breath and squeezed the boy's body into his, trying to imprint on his memory how </span>
  <em>
    <span>bloody</span>
  </em>
  <span> important this being was to him. So he could draw on these moments when Severus </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> leave because that was inevitable. The war had been excruciating and dreadfully long, even Harry had not safely exited the long-term effects it had brought upon all of them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I think you are right," he said, pressing his face into Severus' hair. "But it will be okay."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When Harry awoke, Severus was wrapped around him as if he might disappear in the night.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This body holding me</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So... I took a long break.<br/>I'm in the middle of a move, and it's getting cold outside, so I took some time out to write instead.<br/>I'm very glad I did cuz I realized last chapter was way short.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Harry was extremely happy to have Draco bring both Teddy and Scorpius again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He hadn't been able to do much research with Severus orbiting him like a lost planet, constantly moving around him as he moved through space and time. It was like he was an island, and Severus was the ocean. He could never go far without the teen, and lord, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>tried.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Eventually, he hid in the loo to find any peace.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This meant that he was limited on time to do anything more than answer questions and have extremely uncomfortable existential conversations.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He just needed </span>
  <em>
    <span>someone</span>
  </em>
  <span> to shoulder some of the weight, and it was very unfortunate that it happened to be Teddy Lupin that Severus fixated upon next. Anything Teddy did was followed up by Severus maneuvering into the same space to help, or clean up, or redirect. It would be endearing if Severus hadn't been doing it to Harry for a week or two.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I really mean it, mate. Thank you </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>much for stopping by." Harry muttered as they both watched Teddy throw books down out of the shelves while Severus obediently replaced them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Uh, apparently, it is appropriate. Teddy hasn't shut up about 'Uncle Sev' since last we visited. And it appears that they are- good?- for each other." Draco said, leaning in to keep his voice low. Baby Scorp was blissfully napping on his father's shoulder, drooling on the nice lapel of Draco's Armani suit non-stop. Harry smiled, he could see Severus loved children, especially when they weren't at Hogwarts. Maybe this only applied to children under age eleven, because </span>
  <em>
    <span>then</span>
  </em>
  <span> he could imagine that Snape would take a hard stance against the very idea of kids. "Have you been able to read about the desired effects of the potion, at least?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry's smile disappeared. "The desired effect was to reverse his age, to start life over again. </span>
  <em>
    <span>That</span>
  </em>
  <span> much has been achieved, right?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I know what the end result was, Potter, but potions don't just </span>
  <em>
    <span>end up</span>
  </em>
  <span> doing what the maker wants. He could have been making a special anti-venom for all we know, but the result is not always the desired effect. How did you even pass the fucking class, moron?" Draco hissed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I fucking cook, how much of a difference is there?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Potion making is not like </span>
  <em>
    <span>cooking,</span>
  </em>
  <span> what did those Muggles </span>
  <em>
    <span>do</span>
  </em>
  <span> to you?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>"Really?"</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I'm sorry, but…"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Draco, 'I'm sorry but' isn't an apology. It's the beginning of an excuse, and the Dursleys weren't horrible."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"You can lie to everyone else, Potter, but being locked up as a kid is still a fucking crime. Even Riddle wasn't so cruel... My point remains, that potion wasn't for age-reversal."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry turned to meet Draco's eyes. "What do you think it was for?" The blonde shrugged and readjusted Scorpius so the baby was securely fit on his arm.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Like I said, anti-venom. You don't just use Neems lightly, and for a potion to have, </span>
  <em>
    <span>at most</span>
  </em>
  <span>, ten grams of that ingredient… it would have to be strong enough to fight off the Dark Magic from that snake. This can't be done without knowing exactly how these ingredients work together, and that </span>
  <em>
    <span>flower</span>
  </em>
  <span> you got from the Ministry is a Class Two Restricted Substance."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"That makes me feel </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>much better, knowing that I could get five years in Azkaban…."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They don’t throw you to the Dementors for having a small amount of an illegal substance. They fine you for about three thousand galleons and slap you on the wrist before banning you from most potions shops for two months.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I assume this has happened to you before?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Have you ever been called in because I had illegal potions ingredients?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No...?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“My point has been made.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry thought about that, and he laughed at himself because he </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> had a case of illegal ingredients cross his desk. "You're always right."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco sniffed. "I know that."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I dunno what I would do without you." Harry said honestly. Knowing full well that Draco had been waiting a </span>
  <em>
    <span>lifetime</span>
  </em>
  <span> to hear those words from him. Draco's blush kept him docile, he looked down and nodded once.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I know that, too." The blonde whispered. "I just can't believe it took you so long to realize it."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry's bark of laughter broke the sudden ice around them, but it also drew Severus and Teddy's attention. The toddler was holding a large book and struggling to hold it with his little arms. "Uncle Sev," Teddy called.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But Severus' eyes flitted between Harry and Draco, narrowing as he came to a conclusion that Harry was sure to hear about later. He wasn't paying </span>
  <em>
    <span>any</span>
  </em>
  <span> attention to Teddy's struggle. Harry wondered about it, worried about what </span>
  <em>
    <span>exactly</span>
  </em>
  <span> he was seeing that made him so upset.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Bang!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Silence, so thick that you could drop a pin and it would echo, flooded the house. Not even the pipes and walls wanted to speak their mind. And then Scorpius started wailing; Teddy was apologizing as profusely as a two-year-old possibly could; and Draco was handing Scorpius to Harry so he could comfort Teddy. But Severus didn't flinch, he was just glaring at Harry in a way that chilled the spine. Pinning Harry to the wall, a sickening display of apathy. Like a kid plucking the wings off a dragonfly before letting it go. Letting it flounder without help, unable to protect itself from other predator bugs. Harry had </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> felt more afraid of someone, but it wasn't like the kind of fear for his life, it was something charged and violent.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Teddy, what did we talk about? When we broke Aunt Tori's vase?" Draco was chastising, not giving them a second look as he hauled the book off the floor.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Not to throw stuff," Teddy said sheepishly. "But Sev was supposed to help me, he said it would make me a better wizard!"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry struggled with Scorpius, the baby seemed to feel the piercing gaze and it unnerved him as much as Harry. He felt severe empathy for the infant, and silently begged Severus to relent, </span>
  <em>
    <span>at least for now, you can flay me alive later, just leave the baby out of it, give me a break…</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
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